Fic: The Diary (R) 2/?

[blue_icy_rose]

Title: The Diary
Rating: R
Word Count: 1,527
Pairings: Sam/Buffy
Spoilers: Buffy: All seasons. SPN: Through season 3.
Warnings: Language, sexual situations in later chapters.
Summary: All Dawn was doing was looking for a pair of shoes. Instead, she found one of Buffy's diaries, getting caught up in the story of how Buffy had met Sam and Dean Winchester.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything associated with Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Supernatural. They belong to Joss Whedon and Eric Kripke.
Notes: My first Sam/Buffy, so be gentle on me, folks! Hope you enjoy and feedback's always welcome. Written for tamingthemuse (prompt: conqueror).

First posted at The Road to Destiny.

Previous Chapters


If there was one thing that Dawn had learned in The Sunnydale Years, as she liked to call them, it was that Buffy could be out for hours at a time. It didn’t bother her anymore, not the way it had that year after Buffy had first been brought back. She understood that Buffy just couldn’t help herself. Even with all the Slayers now, she had to go out every night and fight. She could do the normal thing as well as the next girl but Buffy couldn’t sit back and not do anything when people were in danger.

This was why Dawn was back in Buffy’s room and being very happy that Buffy kept her door closed when she wasn’t in it so no one would be able to see Dawn in there.

Besides, she didn’t think that anyone would really appreciate the answer that she was there to read Buffy’s diary.

Well, maybe a few people would.

It was habit that had her glancing over her shoulder to make sure nobody was standing there before she pulled the box out from under the bed. Even as she opened the box and took out the book, a part of her really expected Buffy to pop up out of nowhere and demand to know what she was doing.

Nothing happened though and Dawn was pretty happy about that as she opened the diary again. She didn’t go to the same spot as last time which would probably have been the logical thing to do. After all, there was more about the Winchesters in that entry right?

But this was Buffy so Dawn knew that there was definitely going to be more entries about the brothers. So instead of the original entry she’d read, she flipped to the next one.

About two years after Sam and Dean had moved, Dawn went through this phase where we couldn’t just call her Dawn. We had to call her Dawn the Conqueror. I’m not quite sure why. I think it had something to do with taking over the city because she said taking over the world would take too long.

Sometimes, I think that’s why she and Spike hit it off so quickly.

The point is, she wanted to rule the city (and she may have only been seven but I have to admit some of those plans were decent – vamps could’ve taken lessons from her, even then) and back then, Mom and Dad weren’t fighting as much.

So, I guess things were good back then. For me, at least. But I remember Sam calling me up that year, completely freaked out because his dad had gotten hurt and he didn’t know what to do or whether John was even going to be okay.

I remember that I stayed up with him for hours on the phone that night. We nearly used up the rest of the minutes on his calling card because of it. And I’m pretty sure that I fell asleep in at least one class the next day.

Mom would have had a fit if she’d known I was on the phone for so long.

It’s funny now that I think about the excuse Sam gave me for John’s injuries. A wild animal attacked them on a camping trip and he had called as soon as they got into town.

Wild animal attack. Looking back on Sunnydale, that’s kind of ironic or something.

Dawn looked up from the entry with a frown. If she was understanding this right, and she was pretty sure she was, then it had been something supernatural that got this John guy. At least, going by what Buffy had said about what Sam had told her. Wild animal attack had been one of Sunnydale’s favorite excuses.

Hoping to find an answer, she quickly skimmed through the rest of the entry, rolling her eyes at some of the stuff that Buffy had remembered and written about. Though the fact that she remembered the details of one of Dawn the Conqueror’s plans made her smile.

“Couldn’t just make this easier on me, could you?” Dawn muttered, skimming over a few more entries. She shook her head. Really, Buffy could make things a lot easier for her to snoop in if she’d just put all the important stuff in one entry.

Not that she was ever going to tell her that. She could just picture that reaction.

Dawn paused as she noticed the beginning of the next entry.

I didn’t tell Sam about being the Slayer when I found out. I was afraid he’d think I was crazy. After all, look how Mom and Dad reacted.

I’d already been locked up for it; no way was I going to lose my best friend over it.

And wasn’t that funny that even back then I considered Sam to be my best friend? Maybe not. He was the only one I actually talked to about things other than the latest color of nail polish.

There are days that I wish I had. He knew about the supernatural by then. He once told me that he’d found out when he was nine. Started figuring it out because of how often they moved or John left and confirmed it by reading John’s journal.

I don’t think I could have handled knowing about this when I was nine. Scratch that, I know I wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Celia died only a year later and I was a mess after that. What would I have been like if I’d known demons were real?

Probably locked up like before, except this time I might have stayed in there. Which is a completely crappy train of thought so I’m hopping off said train now.

Still, it’d have been a lot easier in those first few months of slaying if I’d known I could talk to Sam about that too. Instead, I didn’t talk to anyone – because Watchers don’t count on that front – and I slowly went crazy. Well, crazier. Whatever.

God, that time of my life pretty much sucked. Slaying was making me distant from everyone, Mom and Dad were always fighting...

Yeah, nothing really good.

The night that Merrick died, I was a mess. I was lucky that I hadn’t lost the number to their place because as soon as I had locked myself in my room, I called. I vaguely remember that Dean was the one that answered the phone and that he’d tried to make one of his usual jokes to me, one that I almost always responded to. It was sort of our tradition. I think he knew just how bad things were when I just asked for Sam.

I’m sure the fact that I was seconds away from crying was another sure sign.

And Sam...well, looking back, I kind of feel sorry for him since I pretty much lost it after he asked me what was wrong.

I’m not even sure what I said. I think I babbled something about Merrick and a stake and then Sam probably wondered who the heck Merrick was and how I knew what stakes were. He didn’t ask though. He just let me get it out and then talked with me.

Once we both found out the truth about each other, I never told him that that call was what helped me pull through and go after Lothos.

And, okay, maybe I got the idea for burning down the gym because I remembered Sam always complaining about Dean being a pyro.

Burning down the gym was what finally led to me telling Sam the truth. I had been expelled, Mom was moving me and Dawn to Sunnydale, and everything seemed to be falling apart. I know that the Council would have wanted me to lie to Sam about what happened but when he asked why I had burned down the gym, I only hesitated for a second before blurting out that it had been full of vampires.

The few seconds that it took him to answer were the longest of my life. I was expecting laughter, I was expecting denial, I was expecting him to tell me I needed to go sit in a corner and wait for the men in white coats to come for me. I didn’t expect him to sound shocked while he asked how I knew.

And then we once again used up minutes as we finally talked about everything. And this time, it was definitely everything.

But the funniest part to me will always be Sam deciding not to tell Dean that vampires were out there and not extinct like he said. Ha! Wouldn’t that have made my job easier?

Dawn sat back and licked her lips. This Sam had known about what was out there long before Buffy had found out and she really didn’t want to think what it was that could have gotten his dad and brother into that sort of life.

She glanced down at the diary and she just knew that the reason was going to be in there somewhere.

Letting out a breath, she began to read the next entry.